New Friend Request
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☮♥☯ 2/23/13 8:48 AM
The medium is not the message--the message is the message.
~~ Penn Jillette0 comments -
Happy Holidays, y'all! 12/16/12 8:07 AM
Hope everyone in the Kingdom has the time to enjoy good food, good drink, and good company. Peace and good will towards all!0 comments -
A pirate's life for me... 5/3/11 10:31 AM
How do pirates make their money?
By hook or by crook.
"If you don't want it, give it back." ~Tia Dalma0 comments -
03/03/2011, Bad joke of the day... 3/3/11 9:53 PM
Three vampires walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have a pint of blood."
The second one says, "I'll have one, too."
The third one says, "I'll have a pint of plasma."
The bartender says, "So, that'll be two Bloods and a Blood Lite?"0 comments -
01/01/2011, Happy New Year everyone! :) 1/1/11 1:47 PM
New Year's Day: Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.
~Mark Twain
Here's a funny list for those who may have indulged too fervently last evening. Enjoy! :)
Ten Indications of a New Year Hangover
1. You get it into your head that chirping birds are the Devil’s pets.
2. Trying to gain control of the situation, you continue to tell your room to “Stay still.”
3. Looking at yourself in the mirror induces the same reaction as drinking a glass of fresh paint.
4. The bathroom reminds you of the fairground cry, “Step right up and give it whirl!”
5. You’d rather chew tacks than be exposed to sunlight.
6. You set aside an entire afternoon to spend some quality time with your toilet.
7. You replace the traditional praying on your knees with the more feasible praying in a fetal position.
8. Your catch phrase is, “Never again.”
9. You could purchase a new fridge on the proceeds from recycling the bottles around your bed.
10. Your new response to “Good morning,” is “Be quiet!”0 comments
December 10, 2010 Holiday cheer, one of my favorite quotes... 12/10/10 4:20 PM
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
Dr. Seuss
Dr. Seuss
1 comments
November 1, 2010 11/1/10 10:52 AM
Jack White or Jack Black?
1 comments
10/09/2010 Give Peace A Chance 10/8/10 5:14 PM
On this date in 1940, happy birthday to John Lennon. "Imagine" that!
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October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month 10/1/10 10:55 AM
Change your hues to pink this month to show your support. Do you really need a better reason? Save the ta-tas!!! :)
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September 23, 2010 Autumnal Equinox and Harvest Moon! 9/23/10 6:29 PM
Or if you are of a southern state of mind: Happy fall, y'all! :)
1 comments
09/20/2010, The song stuck in my head... 9/20/10 11:01 AM
Thought I would share. Maybe it will get stuck in your head too.
The old bastard left his ties and his suit
A brown box, mothballs, and bowling shoes
and his opinion so you'd never have to choose
Pretty soon, you'll be an old bastard too
You get smaller while the world gets big
The more you know you know you don't know s*
The whiz man'll never fit you like the whiz kid did
So why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
It's okay if you don't know everything
Why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
It's okay if you don't know everything
Close your eyes close your ears young man
You've seen and heard all an old man can
Spread the facts on the floor like a fan
throw away the ones that make you feel bad
Kids today gettin' old too fast
they can't wait to grow up so they can get some a
They get nostalgic about the last ten years
before the last ten years have passed
Why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
It's okay if you don't know everything
Why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
It's okay if you don't know everything
Tears land on a hand on the chest
The old bastard had a paradigm arrest
You got smaller and the world got big
The more you knew we knew we didn't know s*
The whiz man never fit him the whiz kid did
Why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
cause It's okay if you don't know everything
Why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
It's okay if you don't know everything
Ben Folds~~
"Bastard"
The old bastard left his ties and his suit
A brown box, mothballs, and bowling shoes
and his opinion so you'd never have to choose
Pretty soon, you'll be an old bastard too
You get smaller while the world gets big
The more you know you know you don't know s*
The whiz man'll never fit you like the whiz kid did
So why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
It's okay if you don't know everything
Why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
It's okay if you don't know everything
Close your eyes close your ears young man
You've seen and heard all an old man can
Spread the facts on the floor like a fan
throw away the ones that make you feel bad
Kids today gettin' old too fast
they can't wait to grow up so they can get some a
They get nostalgic about the last ten years
before the last ten years have passed
Why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
It's okay if you don't know everything
Why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
It's okay if you don't know everything
Tears land on a hand on the chest
The old bastard had a paradigm arrest
You got smaller and the world got big
The more you knew we knew we didn't know s*
The whiz man never fit him the whiz kid did
Why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
cause It's okay if you don't know everything
Why you gotta act like you know when you don't know?
It's okay if you don't know everything
Ben Folds~~
"Bastard"
0 comments
September 12, 2010 9/12/10 10:29 AM
Mood: Happy to still have all my parts (minus tonsils).
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08/23/2010, Do we have a national swear word day? 8/23/10 10:59 AM
I think I need one after this weekend. I did find a blog that made me feel better, though. This little tidbit made me smile, so I thought I would share.
"I would recommend swearing, whether in public or in front of the bathroom mirror, for a number of reasons:-
It releases tension and stops you hitting your boss.
Childbirth is not possible without it (for both parents).
The proportion of male deaths would go up at certain times of the month.
Home improvements are not possible without it.
Plumbers can get away with ripping you off without it.
Language would be very boring without the odd cuss and curse."
From: http:innerminx.blogspot.com200712/sweary-mary-and-art-of-vulgar.html
"I would recommend swearing, whether in public or in front of the bathroom mirror, for a number of reasons:-
It releases tension and stops you hitting your boss.
Childbirth is not possible without it (for both parents).
The proportion of male deaths would go up at certain times of the month.
Home improvements are not possible without it.
Plumbers can get away with ripping you off without it.
Language would be very boring without the odd cuss and curse."
From: http:innerminx.blogspot.com200712/sweary-mary-and-art-of-vulgar.html
0 comments
August 1, 2010 Happy Lughnasadh! 8/1/10 10:37 AM
Live, laugh, love...in any order you choose. For those of us in the northern hemisphere, enjoy the warmth while it is here. It will soon be time for hot cocoa and gathering wood for the fire.
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July 26, 2010 Happy All or Nothing Day 7/26/10 8:25 AM
Have your proverbial cake and eat it too. Go for broke. Issue that ultimatum, if you must. It's July 26th - All or Nothing Day.
"If you don't know what you want, then you're just gonna have to take it all." JET--"Come on Come on"
"If you don't know what you want, then you're just gonna have to take it all." JET--"Come on Come on"
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July 22, 2010 Happy Reverend Spooner Day! 7/22/10 9:18 AM
From "Fun-with-words.com"
Reverend Spooner's Tips of the Slung
Rear Deeders, how your beds. Let us salute the eponymous master of the verbal somersault, the Rev. William Archibald Spooner. He left us all a legacy of laughter. He also gave the dictionary a new entry: spoonerism. The very word brings a smile. It refers to the linguistic flip-flops that turn "a well-oiled bicycle" into "a well-boiled icicle" and other ludicrous ways speakers of English get their mix all talked up.
English is a fertile soil for spoonerisms, as author and lecturer Richard Lederer points out, because our language has more than three times as many words as any other – 616,500 and growing at 450 a year. Consequently, there's a greater chance that any accidental transposition of letters or syllables will produce rhyming substitutes that still make sense – sort of. "Spooner," says Lederer, "gave us tinglish errors and English terrors at the same time."
Born in 1844 in London, Spooner became an Anglican priest and a scholar. During a 60-year association with Oxford University, he lectured in history, philosophy, and divinity. From 1876 to 1889, he served as a Dean, and from 1903 to 1924 as Warden, or president.
Spooner was an albino, small, with a pink face, poor eyesight, and a head too large for his body. His reputation was that of a genial, kindly, hospitable man. He seems also to have been something of an absent-minded professor. He once invited a faculty member to tea "to welcome our new archaeology Fellow."
"But, sir," the man replied, "I am our new archaeology Fellow."
"Never mind," Spooner said, "Come all the same."
After a Sunday service he turned back to the pulpit and informed his student audience: "In the sermon I have just preached, whenever I said Aristotle, I meant St. Paul."
But Spooner was no featherbrain. In fact his mind was so nimble his tongue couldn't keep up. The Greeks had a word for this type of impediment long before Spooner was born: metathesis. It means the act of switching things around.
Reverend Spooner's tendency to get words and sounds crossed up could happen at any time, but especially when he was agitated. He reprimanded one student for "fighting a liar in the quadrangle" and another who "hissed my mystery lecture." To the latter he added in disgust, "You have tasted two worms."
Patriotic fervour excited Spooner as well. He raised his toast to Her Highness Victoria: "Three cheers for our queer old dean!" During WWI he reassured his students, "When our boys come home from France, we will have the hags flung out." And he lionised Britain's farmers as "noble tons of soil."
His goofs at chapel were legendary. "Our Lord is a shoving leopard," he once intoned. He quoted 1 Corinthians 13:12 as, "For now we see through a dark, glassly..." Officiating at a wedding, he prompted a hesitant bridegroom, "Son, it is now kisstomary to cuss the bride." And to a stranger seated in the wrong place: "I believe you're occupewing my pie. May I sew you to another sheet?"
Did Spooner really say, "Which of us has not felt in his heart a half-warmed fish?" he certainly could have – he was trying to say half-formed wish.
Lederer offers these other authentic spoonerisms: At a naval review Spooner marvelled at "this vast display of cattle ships and bruisers." To a school official's secretary: "Is the bean dizzy?" Visiting a friend's country cottage: "You have a nosey little crook here."
Two years before his death in 1930 at age 86, Spooner told an interviewer he could recall only one of his trademark fluffs. It was one he made announcing the hymn "Kinkering Congs Their Titles Take," meaning to say "Conquering Kings."
So if you have made a verbal slip, rest easy. Many have. Radio announcer Harry Von Zell once introduced the president as Hoobert Heever. And Lowell Thomas presented British Minister Sir. Stafford Cripps as Sir. Stifford Craps.
Thanks to Reverend Spooner's style-setting somersaults, our own little tips of the slung will not be looked upon as the embarrassing babblings of a nitwit, but rather the whimsical lapses of a nimble brain. So let us applaud that gentle man who lent his tame to the nerm. May sod rest his goal.
Reverend Spooner's Tips of the Slung
Rear Deeders, how your beds. Let us salute the eponymous master of the verbal somersault, the Rev. William Archibald Spooner. He left us all a legacy of laughter. He also gave the dictionary a new entry: spoonerism. The very word brings a smile. It refers to the linguistic flip-flops that turn "a well-oiled bicycle" into "a well-boiled icicle" and other ludicrous ways speakers of English get their mix all talked up.
English is a fertile soil for spoonerisms, as author and lecturer Richard Lederer points out, because our language has more than three times as many words as any other – 616,500 and growing at 450 a year. Consequently, there's a greater chance that any accidental transposition of letters or syllables will produce rhyming substitutes that still make sense – sort of. "Spooner," says Lederer, "gave us tinglish errors and English terrors at the same time."
Born in 1844 in London, Spooner became an Anglican priest and a scholar. During a 60-year association with Oxford University, he lectured in history, philosophy, and divinity. From 1876 to 1889, he served as a Dean, and from 1903 to 1924 as Warden, or president.
Spooner was an albino, small, with a pink face, poor eyesight, and a head too large for his body. His reputation was that of a genial, kindly, hospitable man. He seems also to have been something of an absent-minded professor. He once invited a faculty member to tea "to welcome our new archaeology Fellow."
"But, sir," the man replied, "I am our new archaeology Fellow."
"Never mind," Spooner said, "Come all the same."
After a Sunday service he turned back to the pulpit and informed his student audience: "In the sermon I have just preached, whenever I said Aristotle, I meant St. Paul."
But Spooner was no featherbrain. In fact his mind was so nimble his tongue couldn't keep up. The Greeks had a word for this type of impediment long before Spooner was born: metathesis. It means the act of switching things around.
Reverend Spooner's tendency to get words and sounds crossed up could happen at any time, but especially when he was agitated. He reprimanded one student for "fighting a liar in the quadrangle" and another who "hissed my mystery lecture." To the latter he added in disgust, "You have tasted two worms."
Patriotic fervour excited Spooner as well. He raised his toast to Her Highness Victoria: "Three cheers for our queer old dean!" During WWI he reassured his students, "When our boys come home from France, we will have the hags flung out." And he lionised Britain's farmers as "noble tons of soil."
His goofs at chapel were legendary. "Our Lord is a shoving leopard," he once intoned. He quoted 1 Corinthians 13:12 as, "For now we see through a dark, glassly..." Officiating at a wedding, he prompted a hesitant bridegroom, "Son, it is now kisstomary to cuss the bride." And to a stranger seated in the wrong place: "I believe you're occupewing my pie. May I sew you to another sheet?"
Did Spooner really say, "Which of us has not felt in his heart a half-warmed fish?" he certainly could have – he was trying to say half-formed wish.
Lederer offers these other authentic spoonerisms: At a naval review Spooner marvelled at "this vast display of cattle ships and bruisers." To a school official's secretary: "Is the bean dizzy?" Visiting a friend's country cottage: "You have a nosey little crook here."
Two years before his death in 1930 at age 86, Spooner told an interviewer he could recall only one of his trademark fluffs. It was one he made announcing the hymn "Kinkering Congs Their Titles Take," meaning to say "Conquering Kings."
So if you have made a verbal slip, rest easy. Many have. Radio announcer Harry Von Zell once introduced the president as Hoobert Heever. And Lowell Thomas presented British Minister Sir. Stafford Cripps as Sir. Stifford Craps.
Thanks to Reverend Spooner's style-setting somersaults, our own little tips of the slung will not be looked upon as the embarrassing babblings of a nitwit, but rather the whimsical lapses of a nimble brain. So let us applaud that gentle man who lent his tame to the nerm. May sod rest his goal.
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Consider yourself Rick Roll'd 7/2/10 3:23 PM
LOL!
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Brainy quote... 6/22/10 9:32 PM
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
George Carlin
George Carlin
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Just in case I haven't said it today, Greenday is awesome 6/12/10 2:09 PM
Love the video. Everyone needs their own backup dancers. I lol'd.
She puts her makeup on
Like graffiti on the walls of the heartland
She's got her little book of conspiracies
Right in her hand
She is paranoid like
Endangered species headed into extinction
She is one of a kind
Well She's the last of the American girls
She wears her overcoat
For the coming of the nuclear winter
She is riding her bike
Like a fugitive of critical mass
She's on a hunger strike
For the ones who won't make it for dinner
She makes to enough to survive
For a holiday of working class
She's a runaway of the establishment incorporated.
She won't cooperate
Well She's the last of the American girls
She plays her vinyl records
Singing songs on the eve of destruction
She's a sucker for
All the criminals breaking the laws
She will come in first
For the end of western civilization
She's an endless war
She's a hero for the lost cause
Like a hurricane
In the heart of the devastation
She's a natural disaster
She's the last of the American girls
She puts her makeup on
Like graffiti on the walls of the heartland
She's got her little book of conspiracies
Right in her hand
She will come in first
For the end of western civilization
She's a natural disaster
She's the last of the American girls
She puts her makeup on
Like graffiti on the walls of the heartland
She's got her little book of conspiracies
Right in her hand
She is paranoid like
Endangered species headed into extinction
She is one of a kind
Well She's the last of the American girls
She wears her overcoat
For the coming of the nuclear winter
She is riding her bike
Like a fugitive of critical mass
She's on a hunger strike
For the ones who won't make it for dinner
She makes to enough to survive
For a holiday of working class
She's a runaway of the establishment incorporated.
She won't cooperate
Well She's the last of the American girls
She plays her vinyl records
Singing songs on the eve of destruction
She's a sucker for
All the criminals breaking the laws
She will come in first
For the end of western civilization
She's an endless war
She's a hero for the lost cause
Like a hurricane
In the heart of the devastation
She's a natural disaster
She's the last of the American girls
She puts her makeup on
Like graffiti on the walls of the heartland
She's got her little book of conspiracies
Right in her hand
She will come in first
For the end of western civilization
She's a natural disaster
She's the last of the American girls
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It's song lyrics time... 6/8/10 7:34 AM
Imagine there's no Heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today
Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace
You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one
Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world
You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one
John Lennon - Imagine
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today
Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace
You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one
Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world
You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one
John Lennon - Imagine
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Mmmmm...Jolly Ranchers 5/10/10 5:09 PM
:)
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Happy Birthday to Me! 3/3/10 8:39 AM
Since it is my birthday, I took the liberty of looking up my horoscopes from horoscope.com. My horoscope for Pisces:
"Money and friendship rarely mix, Pisces. Keep this in mind today if a friend hits you up for a loan. You’d be better off helping her strategize ways to earn more money. Much as you like to help the underdog, a temporary approach often does more harm than good. A quick loan won’t help your friend's fundamental problem of compulsive spending. Offering to pay for counseling would be a gift of enduring value."
Nonsense! All my friends know I have no money.
And they also had my Chinese horoscope for Tiger:
"Do your best to get to the heart of any problem. Strong emotions may make ordinary responsibilities more than usually stressful. It may help to write down your feelings or talk to someone you trust. Don't be afraid to take the advice of adventurous or unusual people this evening."
That's better. I prefer adventurous and/or unusual people over the regular kind any day.
"Money and friendship rarely mix, Pisces. Keep this in mind today if a friend hits you up for a loan. You’d be better off helping her strategize ways to earn more money. Much as you like to help the underdog, a temporary approach often does more harm than good. A quick loan won’t help your friend's fundamental problem of compulsive spending. Offering to pay for counseling would be a gift of enduring value."
Nonsense! All my friends know I have no money.
And they also had my Chinese horoscope for Tiger:
"Do your best to get to the heart of any problem. Strong emotions may make ordinary responsibilities more than usually stressful. It may help to write down your feelings or talk to someone you trust. Don't be afraid to take the advice of adventurous or unusual people this evening."
That's better. I prefer adventurous and/or unusual people over the regular kind any day.
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Woo Hoo! I have a blog! 3/1/10 10:26 AM
Now if I only had something to say...I'll think about it and get back to you.
0 comments
The are no blog entries written